Femist

Feminist Movement and Enslavement

The feminist movement didn’t do this to me I did it to myself?

I don’t feel like I have a choice whether to work or not and the feminist movement was supposed to free me and give me choice. Right? In China at one point abortion was punishable by death now it is in some cases forced upon women. Likewise once it was taboo for women to work in the US and now it is required, that is if you want your kids to eat. And for me this since of enslavement to work starts with my children. Everyday when I drop my children off at day care. A core part of me screams this is all wrong – all wrong! I should be caring for my children at home. So I pour over my finances. Cutting expenses to the bone hoping that my husband’s income will become enough and I can care for my children at home. We live simply in a 1960 single story ranch. I am a big subscriber to the “Not So Big House” by Sarah Susanka. I also subscribe to the “Not So Big Life” theory. No cell phones, no cable TV. Nothing that over busies me and also by the way cost extra and robs me of my dream to stay at home with my kids.

This is just me pointing out to you that I am not the typical fashion diva American with the over extended mortgage, fancy car, maxed out credit cards. Truth is for most families both parent have to work to make a modest living. I have less spending and investment power today than my parents did. My paycheck to paycheck existence more closely resembles my Grandparents who started their family in 1922 as third generation farmers. And my grandmother worked hard to keep that farm running. These where not the times when farmers could afford to hire lots of farm labor. Her mother came from a wealthier time in American history and actually did not work. In fact my great grandmother had a nanny and a maid. My hard working grandmother went through the great depression in Louisiana. Only now if Louisiana recovering from that time.

In 2008 I am not going through the Great Depression like my grandmother but my diary looks more and more like hers everyday. I think of our economic depression as the “5 O’clock Shadow Depression”. An insidious economic force that governments and large markets try to correct only to discover it has grown back again. Day after day they shave it back and day after day it grows back again.

So back to that original thought: “I don’t feel like I have a choice whether to work or not and the feminist movement was supposed to free me and give me choice. Right?”
Well the problem is not feminism it’s the economy. The feminist movement was really restricted to the right to vote, right to work, right to reproductive health care, right to equal pay. If we as women want the feminist movement to include the right not to work than we need to get a march’in. Keep in mind that means restructuring our economy so that one earner income is enough for a middle class family. This is a big fight. It includes health care reform, tax reform and immigration reform. It’s gonna get ugly girls.

I see nothing wrong with not wanting to stay at home with your kids. I have no judgment for either the stay at home mom or the go to work mom. A friend of mine is a Congress women and I posed my feelings to her. She looked at me like I was stupid and said “Social Security is about to collapse as it is, we can’t have half of America’s tax base staying at home.” So that is why I work to pay my social dues and keep Social Security floating?? She is all about “the greater good” and public service and in her mind this all adds up. In my mind I see myself failing in my social responsibility to raise children who are - “emotionally and morally well funded”. In her mind she is helping to care for Americas elderly.

So I feel that I am a feminist that failed the feminists before me. I sat down and enjoyed their efforts but didn’t keep fighting. But now my baby is going to kindergarten in 2 months. The time to stay at home has slid through my fingers. Don’t think for a minute however that I will stop the feminist fight so that all women have the right to chose to stay at home.

Going back to my theology classes from college

I took a good bit of theology in college and it looks like its time to revisit it. We used to have a game in theology classes called "the bible doesn't say that". This is a polite way of call in bullsh*t on someone who is interpreting the bible. I am going to the dead sea scrolls opening tomorrow night. One of the wonderful things about the scrolls found near the dead sea is what they do to Genesis. You find the interpretation of the scrolls seeping into the biblical translation. No harm done speculating but there is a point when you just have to say, "hey that sounds great but you know what - the bible just doesn't say that". Just because Genesis talks about the "firmament of the sky" or "the dome of the sky" does not mean that the bible says the earth was a half dome. We know that Hebrews had a beleif that the earth was a half dome held up by pilars and sheol was underneath but hey sorry its not really in the bible as a description of the earth.

Here is another fun one:
GENESIS 6:1 When men began to increase on earth and daughters were born to them, 6:2 the beney ha'elohim (angels) saw how beautiful the daughters of men were and took wives from among those that pleased them. 6:3 The Lord said, "My breath shall not abide (My spirit will not remain in ) in man forever, since he too is flesh; let the days allowed him be one hundred and twenty years." 6:4 It was then, and later too, that the Nephilim appeared on earth when the beney ha'elohim (angels) cohabited with the daughters of men, who bore them offspring. They were the heroes of old, the men of renown.

"beney ha'elohim": always translates as angles. Not fallen angels or tall angels or green polka dotted angels - just plain old angels accept for one item they are "sons of God" in others words not daughters.

"daughters of men": are just daughter of men. Not the extra wicked evil daughters of Cain.

"Nephilim means big or giant or giant in spirit". Big how? mentally, spiritually, emotionally - well the bible just says big, hereos and renowned. Book of Giants from the scrolls found near the dead sea say 450 feet tall in some cases but - "the bible doesn't say that".

So in the end translation: all we have is "son angels" and female humans creating big, heroic offspring.

No one likes this so they come up with all sorts of elaborate translations of this scripture. One reason I have discovered is that people voice discomfort with the unruly nature of angels. Sorry its just one of many Christian mysteries.

All I can tell you is God created heaven and earth and the Bible gives us a ton of information about the creation earth and not much about heaven. So who knows. I can tell you that Jesus says in Matthew "For in the resurrection they neither marry, nor are given in marriage, but are as the angels of God in heaven". It sounds like somewhere in between Genesis and Matthew that angels stopped marrying.

Theology Lecture - God created man and women

So I went to the theology lecture last night.It was great. And it was about the ways that God created us before "the fall". One of the ways God created us was 'man and women'.

I thought it might be disappointing because it started in the regular cliche church way. Pointing out the difference of men and women as the way a man or a women gives driving directions or the attention paid to wall paint colors and that kind of crap. Sort of like as a women I am sitting here right now thinking about how shiny my hair is or how good it smells. Theologians always confuse themselves with cultural anthropologist.

And unfortunately our speaker also digressed into the area of extra DNA on the X versus the Y chromosomes or who uses more of their brain in what way. That might be meaningful information if came from brain surgeon of geneticist.

However when it came to the theology piece Dr. John Hammett from Southeastern Baptist Seminary in Wake Forest knocked it out of the park. God saw that Adam was alone and that it was not good. God was not lonely. Adam had direct contact with God and he wasn't lonely either. But Adam was alone not lonely. God recognized it. More importantly God admitted he wasn't enough for Adam. God is all powerful and could have easily decided to be enough for Adam but chose not to be. He could have made Adam a self reproducing creature. But he did not. He could have given Adam another man to hang out with but he didn't instead he created someone "different" than Adam that could fulfill in Adam what God could not. Eve has a special ability given to her by God to fulfill in a man something that God has chosen not to. Is this just sex and reproduction? That would be so much simpler and easy - But no, God saw that Adam was "alone" and that it was not good. The special ability of Eve is to solve the puzzle of "alone" not the puzzle of "sex". Sex applies just to the married couple. But this unique ability given to women by God extends to all male to female relationships not just married couples. It is essential to how women function in the church. Women fill the "alone gap" in the lives of the men in their church. A gap in the church that God has purposeful chosen not to fill even in his own church. An ability he has ordained just to women.

Now there is the stuff of good theology. Not about equality or inequality or whether or not women are more interested in the latest addition of Pottery Barn magazine.

For Fathers Day

I got my husband a massage for fathers day. We belong to Life Time Fitness. I love it. I do Tae Kwon Do at a DoJang in town and I get very sore. So I use life time fitness to unwind. My husband actually works out they way you are supposed to when you join a health club. Lately his work out schedule has been very erratic because he is working on a public installation for the museum and it is very very strenuous. He is a sculptor. I have been trying to encourage him to go to LTF and just sit in the jacuzzi or sauna. Relax. But he has been even too beat down to do that. So I got him a gift cert for a massage at LTF to use after the installation is complete. The opening is this Wednesday. But I looked at his hands and feet when we where at the beach this weekend and I think he will need a pedicure next. Maybe a hair cut. You know I like it that I can send my husband over to the LTF spa and have women dote on him. I think men need to see that women are gentle, caring people. The massages are done by licensed massage therapists and I don't have to worry about it being - well -lets just say a 'breach of our marriage vows'. I do get back a refreshed, happy husband.

Now back to the problem of getting a NC Teaching Certfication - Part 2

NC teaching certification, certificate and licensure - part 2

Most people who want to teach already have a bachelors degree. I polled nearly 1500 working professionals over 72% of them said they wanted to change careers to teaching at some point and would have happily accepted the cut in pay but couldn't figure out how to make the licensee process make sense.

NC teaching certification, certificate and licensure - part 2

Lateral Entry is just one option:
Lateral entry is 2 years of barely better than minimum wage pay. Now when a working professional says they will take a cut in pay they don't mean they are willing to impoverish their families. Additionally you have to do six or more hour of course work at an accredited college - yes you will pay for that. You will also have to apply and you will pay 136.00 for the privilege of filling out a job application. You will also have to take the PRAXIS test and yes you will also have to pay for that as well as the various teacher association fees.

NC teaching certification, certificate and licensure - part 2

NC DPI - you have been in government land for too long. Here is how the real world works. -
I was recruited into my job. I was paid just to interview. I was given a sign on bonus. My company pays for my yearly training and professional association fees. This is the standard most professionals are accustom too. I get paid days off and they are real days off not "teacher work days". I only work 8 hours a day. I get a paid hour for lunch. I don't arrive early for bus duty. I don't spend the wee hours of my night grading papers.

NC teaching certification, certificate and licensure - part 2

At one point I decided I wanted to move up in my career so I need a specific certification. I did want to tell my boss I was considering this move so I paid for the courses my self. It would mean a 20K increase a year in pay for me. I paid for and took the 2 WEEK CLASS it cost 5K. Pay attention here NC DPI "2 weeks" not "2 years". I took the exam - it was 500.00 and joined the professional organization on my dime it was an additional 400.00. I have to do 10 hours of course work a year to maintain my certification but my new employer pays for my time off to do it and for the course fees.

NC teaching certification, certificate and licensure - part 2

Now your second option to get you NC Teaching Certificate is go back to college. Yes that is right go spend 30K to get a degree that will probably mean a cut in pay. When it is time to send you own kids to college and you don't have the money just say sorry honey mommy spent all your college money getting certified to be a teacher.
Oh and don't forget you still have to pay all fees for the teaching application and the PRAXIS test.

NC teaching certification, certificate and licensure - part 2

I will take the cut in pay to teach - happily. I am qualified engineer and if you want me to come teach real world math and science to our nations future, I would be over joyed to do it. But I will not pay one red penny to do it. If you want me to take classes to prepare myself - fine but it is on your dime and your time. Just like the real world.

NC teaching certification, certificate and licensure - part 2

Listen closely NC DPI. If you want more teachers. Make it easier to become one. Get rid of the application fee. It's just offensive. It is the NC DPI's privilege to have teaching applicants not the applicants privilege to apply. Who ever came up with this idea of paying to apply for a job - needs a random drug test. Know what I mean.

NC teaching certification, certificate and licensure - part 2

How about this. Come up with a 2 week certification training course for 5000.00. Have the state create a way to finance the cost as a student loan. You'll find it is the industry standard just look at say CCNA certification or PMP Certification. All about 5K and about 2 weeks. Only difference is you leave with a certification that allows you to make 90k a year. Next take the PRAXIS. Did you pass - Great! Here is your NC Teaching License.

NC teaching certification, certificate and licensure - part 2

Last thing "the background check". Schools should pay for this. Just like regular employers. The idea of having to pay for my own background check is just ridiculous.

NC Teaching Certification - for the application impaired

After several hours and many, many, many days of painstaking research on web trying to find out how to get certified to be a teacher in NC. I finally said to myself - "self ask your sister she is a principal". I like to try to gather as much information on my own before asking for help but I honestly was getting no where.

This was her response:
-"The problem is is that its not quick and easy. They make it long, difficult
and impossible.

Here's the info on how: http://www.ncpublicschools.org/licensure/lateral/

Let me know if you have questions - getting a teaching license is like
opening fort knox."-

I also ran across an article where the NC DPI is just racking away with their little brains trying to figure out "Why do we have a teacher shortage?" Hummm.
No doubt the commitee working on the problem is composed of Tweetle Dee and Tweetle Dumb.

NC Teacher hiring issue reminds me of a nation wide human resources study I did - not too long ago on "Why there is a shortage of Hospital Pharmacists". AND "Why can't we retain pharmacists?" The hospital pharamcist pay was fantastic, I mean astronomical. But is should be because the pressure on the pharmacist is sickening. Make a mistake and someone might die plus your career is done. How would you like that as the baseline for you performance evaluation? Talk about a stomach ulcer job.

The job doesn't offer a ton of challenge. You know - you pretty much prepare prescriptions all day. And by 'day' I mean 10 to 14 hour shifts. 3 weeks on 1 week off including 2 weekends. Location was everything to them because if your job is going to be hell you might as well like where you live. So one piece of advice we gave to the hospital was invest in the location of your Hospital. Such as a community center. Something

There is no advancement - you are a pharmacist or the director of pharmacy and really the two are the exact same job. There is no prestige in the job you are either a good pharmacist or a fired pharmacist. These where the only factors that the Hospitals Human Resources Department would look at and they where stumped?

But the pharmacists themselves kept telling the Hospitals what the problem was. It was TIME. Its the crappy schedule. No one can consistently over several decades do flawless work doing 10 to 14 hour shifts - 3 weeks on and 1 week off including 2 weekends. Not mention you can't date, consistently be apart of your church and you can't raise a child with a schedule like this. No one offers daycare for 14 hour shifts. And what kind of mom really wants to put her child in day care for 14 hours for 3 weeks straight. We surveyed 1000s of pharmacist - the pharmacist kept saying over and over "we just want 4 hour shifts, 3 weeks on and 1 week off with just one week end a month. Over 80% of the pharmacist came up with this exact schedule across the board. The pharmacist said. Go ahead, pay me less, scale back my benefits - just give me a better schedule.

And the crickets chirped. The Hospital Human Resources committee scratched their heads and said, "Hummm, I just don't understand why we have a shortage of hospital pharmacists, why can't we retain them."

idiots.

The Dad that Changed My Mind

I didn't have a good dad. But this is a story about how I ended up marrying a man who is a very good dad. I had the Dad that lived in our house but was never apart of my life except to explode with anger, make unreasonable demands and make a lot of money. He started me 1 year late to first grade so that I would have more time to learn the chores my mother did to keep our house. He refused to let me do my homework because he felt that when a girl arrived home she should be helping her mother with the house. So each day after school I sat in detention until my homework was done. I met most of my friends and boyfriends in detention and needless to say it was poor company to keep. But when I was about 10 an awakening began. it started down the street where there was a Catholic family with 7 daughters. They had 2 sets of twins that where only 18 months apart. When the oldest was about 11 their mother died of skin cancer. She was a wonderful loving mother of the best kind. The neighborhood buzzed about how sad it was and that the children would probably be sent out to the far flung reaches of America to live with different relatives. But each day the girls arrived at the bus stop. Their hair braided neatly and their dresses clean. They each had a nicely packed lunch and looked as if they where recovering well from loosing their mom. Time continued to pass and the girls excelled in school, ballet class and soccer practice. One time one of the older girls had no date for the Prom so her dad took her. Their father never molested or neglected or forced the girls to take on the duties of their mother who had passed. They where loved and cared for by a hard working father who treat them like the children they where. For a brief time their father hired a nanny to pick up the preschooler. Once the littlest hit first grade he hired a tutor to be there at the bus stop to greet the children and take them home to do their school work for 2 hours until he arrived home from work. This is back when people had 9 to 5 jobs. That was it that was all the outside help he ever hired. He did all the cooking and cleaning plus the nurturing and loving. He had no idea but he raised the bar, raised my expectation of what a father is. As a result my children have a good dad who can dress them and cook for them and read them stories with all the love and devotion of a Father. - Happy Fathers Day.

Building My Lung Capacity

I smoked my last 2 years of high school and first 2 years of college. Then I quit. I smoked a lot. It is 15 years later and I am still feeling it. I think that when they say, "if you quit you can repair your lung" it just is not so true. I got sick 2 years ago and my doctor said I had such diminished lung capacity that it was a big issue. So I did some research on building lung capacity. This is what I found.

1. Exercise is the eye of the needle. At the time I started this quest I didn't exercise but I was very active with 2 small children. So I started doing Tae Kwon Do because it met this criteria:

1. Cross over aerobic threshold by sprinting at the end of a short run. Warm up jogging 2 minutes. Sprint set one minute. 3 sets.

I love Tae Kwon Do and my lung capacity is much better but I still need to do more work. I haven't done much else about the problem until now.

2. Now I am starting to reduce my C-reactive protein (CRP), an inflammatory marker, circulating in the blood. I am already 90% vegetarian.

1,200 IU of Vitamin E
L-carnitine or Acetyl-l-carnitine
Vitamin B6 (drinking it in water - Propel by Gatorade)
Aspirin (baby)
Gugulipid - 1500 mg daily
Proteolytic Enzymes - UniZyme

This part is sporadic right now because I have an aversion to supplements. They tend to upset my stomach. I have problems with sever spastic colon and it is a lot of trial and error to get the right supplement.

3. Get in the swimming pool and swim under water. One lap under water - stop and get your breath back. Do another lap under water. Just do as many as you can before your tired. I've just been doing this in the summer when it is fun to swim. If you like to snorkel regularly then just do it 'mask only'.

4. Voice lessons. This is on my I want to do list but don't have the time or money right now. I am hesitating because I have a really bad singing voice and I am ashamed of it. It bothers me just to sing in church. My voice never stays on key and I am really sensitive to sound. Oh, I should tell you I was diagnosed with high functioning autism at 9. Sensory stuff is my number one weak point.

5. Take up a wind instrument - I played the flute in junior high school. I don't want to play the flute ever again. I wouldn't mind taking up the oboe. But that is on the list after voice lessons. Who has time for it all?